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Two important things to focus on if you want to build a healthy relationship by Auntie Odo

What is a relationship? A relationship is a way two or more people are connected cordially or by blood. It is also an agreement between two people who are prepared to cleave to one another (marriage). According to the Oxford dictionary, a relationship is a way in which two people behave and involved to each other. In Genesis 2:18, “The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a help mate’…”This means that a man and a woman relationship is a good thing in the sight of God. One of the ways people think they can show their love or letting their partners know they value or cherish them is to publicize their relationship. Therefore, some people resort to social media as a means to exhibit their love, promote their relationship, or establish their intentions or desires for their loved ones or partners. But publicizing your relationship does not guarantee a healthy relationship.

In the 21st century, Facebook, WhatsApp, Instagram, Twitter, Zoom and Telegram have some influences on relationships both positive and negative. Has social media had a negative influence on relationships or has it helped to improve it? Yes! it has. A research was conducted by Clarissa Silva which was published on February 6, 2018, revealed that 80% reported that it is easier to deceive others through their social posting. Social media has become one of the powerful tools for broken relationships. It breaks relationships within a twinkle of an eye yet this same social media brings people together for life. Most men and women have broken their relationships as a result of social media. The world is becoming a “Global Village” so we cannot live without social media. Facebook was invented in February, 2004, followed by WhatsApp in 2009. These were created to make communication easier and to help in the dissemination of information faster. But our private lives, plans and daily routines should not be published on social media. One can be tracked and monitored easily.

Now the main purposes or functions of social media have lost their value. This is because people are now using these social media to showcase their private lives and display their nudity to the public while others tarnish the images of others by posting their naked pictures on social media.

Social media was not meant to specifically promote or grow relationships. A research conducted by S.P Christensen in 2008 has shown that, many partners fought, developed misunderstandings and lost interest and trust for each other because they all felt their partners were cheating. And also, the inability to meet the desires of one another. This is due to lack of attention for each other as a result of time spent browsing and chatting. One must keep a solid relationship away from social media. This is because social media is a public sphere so there is no need to take your private life to the public.

Posting your loved ones and family pictures on social media are not the only way to show love. Sometimes, a lot of people get confused and worried when their partner's posts or comments on people's pages or timelines. Some women become jealous when their partners are addicted to social media and vice versa. Social media has brought mistrust in marriages and relationships. Some men and women are both engaged in an extramarital affair as a result of that. For example, if you buy a new vehicle and register, it doesn’t guarantee automatically that the vehicle is solidly in good condition. If the engine is not in good shape, the vehicle can not move or work properly. The same thing applies to our relationships too. Beauty does not guarantee marriage but rather good works and a well-shaped or molded character.

Posting or using your partner's pictures as your profile on all the social media platforms does not guarantee a successful marriage or relationship. Social media was not created to grow marriages or relationships, this is because our forefathers had wonderful marriages than we currently have in our days or time. Therefore we are going to look at some important tips for building healthy relationships or some important things we must focus on in relationships. This will help your relationship to grow from grace to grace as it is written in 2 Peter 3:18a, ‘But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ...’” if you follow the following tips below:

How do we plant and grow relationship?

• First of all, every tree grows out of a seed and it is also planted before it geminates. This is how a tree is planted. First of all, nurse the seed by digging a hole in the soil then, put the seed in the hole, cover it with soil and water is from time to time. The seed will germinate inside the soil and attach itself inside the soil by growing firm roots before it erupts on the surface of the earth as a seedling, and gradually begins to grow taller and bigger firmly on the earth. Take notice that we do not sprinkle seeds on the surface of the earth, with the assurance that it will grow. The reason is, birds can eat it up, or people can trample upon it and this will destroy the seed and it will not grow. Before a relationship can grow and end up in marriage, you must plant and grow it. Don’t expose your relationship at it early stages to the public. Fighting and gaining popularity by forcing your partners to post your pictures social media does not have the basis of becoming a wife or a husband. Be patient and keep the relationship secretly or privately. Work on the relationship very well with your partners. Moreover, both of you must work on your character and behavior to yield a good result which can take the relationship to another level. In other words, when you publicize your relationship it attracts enviness and hatred. Keep your relationship very secret, nurture and grow it into a marriage that attracts God’s blessings and joy to the public.

• Secondly, let your good works be seen and felt in the relationship. What can you offer as a man or as a woman in the relationship? What you have to do is to portray or exhibit a good character. See conflicts as normal. Both must grow yourselves up emotionally to understand each other. Develop a happy mood all the time even when it’s difficult. Also learn to control your emotions and have a sweet spirit for communication. Develop a good listening attitude to avoid unnecessary arguments and never reward bad behavior. These are what relationships dwell upon to grow. Always remember to commit your relationship into God's hands as it is written in Proverbs 3:6, “In all your ways acknowledge God and He shall direct your path”. Watch the video below if you want to see this whole situation demonstrated in action

FOR MORE OF THESE STUDIES, JOIN OUR ONLINE SCHOOL,”ODO UNIVERSITY’. And learn more about how to find and grow love. 3Y3 ODO NKOAA!!!!!

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